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Robert Heinlein's Pre-Internet Fan Mail FAQ
Posted by
Soulskill
on Wed Sep 10, 2008 01:05 AM
from the tanstaafl dept.
from the tanstaafl dept.
Hugh Pickens writes "Kevin Kelly has an interesting post about a letter he found amongst correspondence from his days editing the Whole Earth Catalog. The letter is Robert Heinlein's own nerdy solution to a problem common to famous authors: to deal with fan mail. In the days before the internet, Heinlein's solution was to create a list of frequently asked questions, answer them, and remove the questions. Then he, or rather his wife Ginny, checked off the appropriate answer(s) and mailed it back. Some of the entries in Heinlein's answer sheet are quite illuminating and amusing. Our personal favorite: 'You say that you have enjoyed my stories for years. Why did you wait until you disliked one story before writing to me?'"
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Why?! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Why?! (Score:5, Insightful)
Wow, offtopic when he mentions Lazarus Long in a Heinlein article. People just don't read these days.
Maybe if you don't know anything about Heinlein, you shouldn't modding
Parent
Re:Why?! (Score:5, Funny)
There's got to be a Lazarus Long quote to fit the situation somewhere. Let's see...
Perhaps the bad mod was an example of "Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect."
but this quote probably fits better: "Never underestimate the power of human stupidity."
Parent
Re:Why?! (Score:5, Insightful)
Lazarus Long reminds me of The Simpsons... there is a quote by him relevant to practically any imaginable topic, The Simpsons by dint of its sheer volume and Lazarus Long because of the universality of his quotes.
"The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning, while those other subjects merely require scholarship."
Parent
Re:Why?! (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:Why?! (Score:4, Funny)
People are spoiled because it is free and everybody knows TANSTAAFL
Parent
Re:Why?! (Score:4, Funny)
Maybe if you don't know anything about Heinlein, you shouldn't modding
Maybe he accidentally a coca-cola bottle.
Parent
Citations? (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:Citations? (Score:5, Informative)
The Renshaw reference is regarding "Citizen of the Galaxy": accelerated education using a tachistoscope to provide brief glimpses of material that must be read and or memorized. Using a projector with exposure settings much like a camera, you can learn to recognize things very quickly. I used this when I learned to speed read and it was quite effective.
Parent
Interesting (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Interesting (Score:4, Insightful)
Some of the answers were amusing.
The list makes me think that the *unchecked* "Please do not write to me again" and "Your letter was most welcome! ..." answers also work as special reward and punishment, respectively.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:3, Insightful)
Before, they had to write the thing, buy a stamp and send it.
Now I can send britney my lesbian star trek fan fiction at the click of a mouse. It's got to be wayyyy worse to go through your mail now. (Assuming you have the intention of attempting to appease your fans by answering). Way easier to delete of course.. :)
Re:It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:5, Insightful)
Every time I feel like writing fan-mail, I think, "Wait, would I really want to be bothered by this? And is it creepy?" and then I don't send it. I'd love to tell Alastair Reynolds how much I enjoy his work, but then I stop myself because the last thing I want to do is waste his time reading "gosh I sur luv ur books lawl" when he could be spending that time writing more books...
Parent
Re:It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:5, Funny)
This is why hate mail makes so much more sense. People like reading their hate mail.
Parent
Re:It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:4, Insightful)
Hatemail, on the other hand, I can deal with. Sometimes they have a point and it makes you think. Sometimes they're funny. And sometimes it makes you shake your head and want to leap on theirs. All in all though, I find it much easier to respond to.
Parent
Well, check out the last answer on the list : (Score:5, Insightful)
Parent
Re:It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:5, Funny)
My fans are pretty well-behaved. Sometimes they'll say "hi" to me on the street, but they're almost always too shy to tell me that they recognize me from the photos on my blog. Occasionally, my more enthusiastic fans will take time out of their workdays to send me fan mail, often exclaiming that I'm "Super lucky!" or "Pre-qualified!". I do find it a bit creepy when my more ardent fans send me lists of all of the public places I've been in the past few weeks. Although I don't usually notice them when I'm out and about, some of them must get pretty close, as they've been keeping track of my spending habits.
Come to think of it, rising political stars often take advantage of the boost in self-confidence that comes with their new stature on the national stage to send me personalized greetings in the mail, praising our shared values and beliefs. Somehow, though, we always lose that special connection once they're in office.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Every time I feel like writing fan-mail, I think, "Wait, would I really want to be bothered by this? And is it creepy?" and then I don't send it.
One thing that tells you is that your personality profile has an "I" in it instead of an "E", due to the 2 italicized words in the quote. That said, I'm sure almost anyone would appreciate novel, well-thought-out, positive, criticism. That said, I always figure someone has always beaten me to it with a better-thought-out note already, so I don't send it either.
Re:It isn't "better" now, though... (Score:4, Funny)
I am intrigued by your lesbian star trek fan fiction and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
Parent
Answer to answer (Score:4, Interesting)
Because if you're a good writer, you might have pleased millions.
And if millions of people write to you, it could make the postman unhappy (and other people too).
There's already a good way to show appreciation - via the writer's bank account.
That said, do write an appreciation letter if it's for something exceptional (or your letter is going to be something worth reading).
But millions of letters just saying "I liked your latest book" might get a bit tiresome (or worse think star trek fan vs Shatner ala SNL ).
Good idea (Score:5, Funny)
( )The intervieuw
( )The ramblings
was
( )intresting
(X)informative
(X)funny
( )bullshit
and thank you for
(X)sharing this with us
( )informing us of such a very important item.
( )wasting our time
Re:Good idea (Score:5, Informative)
Parent
Reminds me of this (Score:5, Interesting)
via [thislife.org]
Re:Reminds me of this (Score:4, Interesting)
Stephen Goldin's 23 rules
I count 17 actual rules and 6 "refer to rule X" clauses where the same rule applies to other situations.
The gist however is don't be an ass, do the right thing at the right event, be generous and buy the bloke a meal or drink. Seems like common sense to me. I guess it's not so common (especially for some of the less socially adept that attend these conventions).
Parent
Another one (Score:5, Informative)
There's a copy here: http://mackereth.net/images/SotW_Thank_You_Card.jpg [mackereth.net]
Televangelists did it better (Score:5, Interesting)
One of the big-name televanglists (Billy Graham?) had an early computerized system for answering his fan mail. A staff of people read the mail, and used highlighter to mark phrases that contained relevant keywords. Data entry operators keyed in the address and the highlighted phrases. A program used the phrases to select an appropriate canned reply, filled in keywords, added bible citations, and printed out a letter.
Re:Televangelists did it better (Score:5, Interesting)
One of the big-name televanglists (Billy Graham?) had an early computerized system for answering his fan mail. A staff of people read the mail, and used highlighter to mark phrases that contained relevant keywords. Data entry operators keyed in the address and the highlighted phrases. A program used the phrases to select an appropriate canned reply, filled in keywords, added bible citations, and printed out a letter.
BAD famous person!
I once wrote Johnny Isakson about the PDEA (piracy deterrance and enforcement act) which would have turned the p2p wars into the war on drugs, and received a canned reply about the public domain enhancement act.
Makes me want to pick up my rolled up newspaper and swat him good and proper, then lock him in the garage.
Parent
Read "Grumbles from the Grave"... (Score:5, Interesting)
"Grumbles from the Grave" is a (now out-of-print) posthumous collection of letters from Heinlein, mostly between himself, publishers, and other SF Authors. It contains many letters on dealing with Fan Mail, Fans themselves, critics, publishers, etc. Quite an interesting little book.
SirWired
Good old Robert (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Good old Robert (Score:5, Interesting)
Parent
Re:Good old Robert (Score:5, Funny)
Heinlein got the technology of the cellphone absolutely right but it didn't occur to him that in the future people would just keep chatting away, annoying people around them.
Well, there's a reason it's called science FICTION, no?
Parent
Because... (Score:4, Funny)
'You say that you have enjoyed my stories for years. Why did you wait until you disliked one story before writing to me?'
Because, if I sent you a fan letter after every story I liked you would probably have me arrested for stalking.
Re:who ? (Score:5, Informative)
is this idiot ? and why cvant he use a computer ?
TFA makes it quite clear that it's talking about days before home computing, not the days before the internet.
Parent
Re:who ? (Score:5, Funny)
is this person who reads the TFA ? and why cant he act like other /.ers ?
Parent
Re:who ? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm not sure that is an excuse; I'm fairly confident that Robert & Virginia Heinlein were fully capable of producing a computer from parts from a TV, washing machine, and whatever was laying around in the basement, anytime from about 1946 on.
I bet it was the printer that was the sticking point.
Parent
Actually, he missed on that point (Score:4, Informative)
I know that your post is tongue-in-cheek, but the reality is that Heinlein didn't foresee electronic computing and in all of his early works which I am familiar with (e.g., the "Future History") he has human mathematical savants being used for navigation calculations.
Parent
Re:Actually, he missed on that point (Score:5, Informative)
I personally like Space Cadet; its only one sentence, but the character has a pocket-sized portable telephone. 40 years ahead of the curve on the cellphone.
Parent
Re:Actually, he missed on that point (Score:5, Interesting)
For me, what's interesting in that is that one of the character says they put their phone in their suitcase so they didn't have to answer it. It's that very human interaction with technology that makes his writing so believable -- even when, as in this example, he didn't predict the exact form of the future (ie the need for a power button).
Parent
Re:Actually, he missed on that point (Score:5, Interesting)
The early stories did have some computers; Heinlein just fell into the same trap as most writers then and thought they would always be huge. "Slipstick" Libby was a special case.
Don't forget Deija Thoris Carter. But by then he was making the point (repeated in Friday) that a computer, no matter how fast, may not be able to beat human intuition.
Then there is Lazarus's clone sisters Laz and Lor who IIRC had similar talent with numbers. I won't include Dora Long because she started as a computer in the first place.
Parent
Re:Actually, he missed on that point (Score:4, Funny)
Parent
Re:who ? (Score:4, Funny)
No no... You are confusing him with McGyver.
Parent
I think the TV was the sticking point (Score:5, Interesting)
Read The Door Into Summer: the guy practically designed AutoCAD in 1956, but with the computer interfacing directly with a plotter. The missing piece was the idea of using video rather than the paper itself to visualize intermediate results.
Parent
Re:Makings of a slashdot poll... (Score:4, Funny)
What question in a fan's mail will receive the answer: "Please do not write to me again" ?
Parent
Re:Makings of a slashdot poll... (Score:5, Funny)
What question in a fan's mail will receive the answer: "Please do not write to me again" ?
Writing to say you loved his foundation series.
Parent
Re:Makings of a slashdot poll... (Score:5, Funny)
Do you like what Stanley Kubrick did in the on-screen adaptation of your book?
Parent
Re:Makings of a slashdot poll... (Score:5, Interesting)
Heinlein was very intolerant of anyone who challenged certain of his political views, even driving away life-long friends over very minor issues. He didn't suffer those he saw as fools gladly, and I'm sure he used that check-box often. You can read Spider Robinson's biography and literary reviews of Heinleins work for the sordid details, if you care about that sort of thing. Don't mistake the author for his protagonists.
Parent
Re: (Score:3, Insightful)
Heinlein was very intolerant of anyone who challenged certain of his political views, even driving away life-long friends over very minor issues. He didn't suffer those he saw as fools gladly, and I'm sure he used that check-box often. You can read Spider Robinson's biography and literary reviews of Heinleins work for the sordid details, if you care about that sort of thing. Don't mistake the author for his protagonists.
He must have had a lot of hangers-on though. Politics is a good excuse to use if you are just bored with somebody.
Re:Makings of a slashdot poll... (Score:5, Funny)
You need to maintain a balance. In any room an ideal mixture is half ready to kill you, and half eager to defend you. That's maximum entertainment.
Parent
Re:I have to say (Score:4, Informative)
a lot more polite in that letter than I would have expected from his books. A letter bomb wouldn't have surprised me
Ah, but bombs are expensive, and most people aren't worth the money.
Parent