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The Best Fictional Doomsday Devices
Posted by
ScuttleMonkey
on Thu Nov 13, 2008 08:41 AM
from the doom-proof dept.
from the doom-proof dept.
Ostracus writes to tell us that Wired has an interesting summary of some of the best fictional doomsday devices. These devices have featured heavily in movies, television, and fiction; their list includes favorites from Dr. Strangelove to Futurama. What devices have they missed? "By the time Futurama's sci-fi satire hit the scene, creator Matt Groening had the doomsday-device shtick down. Case in point: the Spheroboom. This highly explosive space/time-bending device isn't just the prized jewel of the show's mad scientist, Professor Farnsworth. It also destroys anyone/anything not wearing a 'Doom-proof Platinum Vest.'"
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Wired slideshow (Score:5, Informative)
It's a Wired slideshow, on 8 separate pages. If you value your time, don't even bother to RTFA. If you don't value your time, please try to find an "all on one page" version for the rest of us.
Re:Wired slideshow (Score:5, Funny)
If you value your time, don't even bother to RTFA
What an odd thing to post to Slashdot
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Re: (Score:3, Informative)
to be fair, there's a thumbnail gallery that lets you jump to any page you want. also, since each device description comes with a large image or a YouTube video, it's probably better that they are put on separate pages for users with older powerful computers or netbooks/smartphones/PSPs/etc., which do not have a lot of memory.
besides, it's not really a slide show as it doesn't have a JavaScript timer that automatically flips to the next slide. it's just a paginated list. and it isn't presented in a tiny pop
Not only that but... (Score:5, Interesting)
It is a thinly veiled Quantum of Solace promo. Because, there are not enough of those already.
From TFA:
Love affair-turbulent-popular-James Bond-love-feel safe-exhilarating.
PAUSE
The opening of Quantum of Solace on Friday-nostalgic-fun.
Subliminal much?
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Thats not what I see (Score:3, Funny)
doomsday turbulent danger cynicism world-ending disasters apocalyptic
opening of Quantum of Solace on Friday catastrophic fear doomsday extinction-bringing
ICE-9 (Score:5, Insightful)
ice-9 [wikipedia.org]: Maybe not intended to be a doomsday device, but it sure turned out to be one!
Re:ICE-9 (Score:5, Informative)
Again, not strictly a doomsday device, but nevertheless, the Lazy Gun [wikipedia.org] is the most ingenious weapon ever inventerised!
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Re:ICE-9 (Score:4, Informative)
ICE-9 is great but I've always been enamored with Ren & Stimpy's "History Eraser Button"
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Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Re:ICE-9 (Score:4, Insightful)
Yeah, but who can honestly say they haven't read Cat's Cradle? I think that's an automatic revocation of geekness.
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Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Indeed - Another soul has received his vin-dit and will soon become a part of our karass, with Cat's Cradle as our wampeter. Sure, Bokonism may be largely comprised of foma, but it's a welcome escape from the slashdot granfaloon.
The new-convert's guide [wikipedia.org]
MEGA MAID! (Score:4, Funny)
mega maid/spaceball one has to be the single most potent weapon in the universe.
it is literally breathtaking.
Ren & Stimpy - History Eraser Button (Score:4, Funny)
The History Eraser Button from Ren and Stimpy, Hands Down.
Don't Touch It!!
You Fool.
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
You can't link to tripod images offsite, if your referral header is missing or not from the site, you get their logo instead.
The Doomsday Machine - Star Trek - missing one (Score:5, Informative)
knew it had to happen (Score:5, Insightful)
/. had for long been one of the last holdouts against this type of "journalistic" garbage.
glad to see you lasted so long, guys. sad to see you give in and publicize this useless junk.
articles like this with absolutely no substance at all don't belong here. i may as well just go look at reddit or fark for this type of stuff.
Re:knew it had to happen (Score:5, Insightful)
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Monty Phyton (Score:5, Informative)
Just ask an alien... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Just ask an alien... (Score:4, Funny)
Ahem, that would be a Pu-236 Explosive Space Modulator.
Perhaps you bought the cheap Acme version?
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Missing option (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Missing option (Score:5, Funny)
3 Taco Bell burritos and a six-pack of Old Milwaukee. Devastation on a cosmological scale.
sounds more like devastation on a colonological scale...
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Mass Driver (Score:4, Interesting)
In Babylon-5 Harlan Ellison came up with mass drivers [wikia.com] as an immoral weapon of mass-destruction on a planet-wide scale. The idea is that you grab nearby asteroids and bombard a habitated planet with them at very high speed. Not only does it indiscriminately kill the population, but the dust kicked up prevents proper plant growth over the entire planet for years, perhaps decades.
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Re:Mass Driver (Score:4, Informative)
And before that in 1966 there was The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress" [wikipedia.org] during the war between Luna and Earth. Though I wouldn't be surprised if there were even earlier examples.
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Re: (Score:3, Informative)
The Loonies [wikipedia.org] were using mass-driver bombardment (albeit from the Moon) in 1966.
I don't know if that's the first occurrance of orbital bombardment by mass driver in SF history; I'm trying to do a quick Google survey between interruptions, but I'm not making any progress. (Too many interruptions, too little "between".)
The toxic waste pipe... (Score:3, Funny)
...behind Dr Fred Edison's mansion.
"I feel like I could... like I could... 'Take on the world!'"
Skynet? (Score:3, Insightful)
HHGTTG (Score:5, Insightful)
The Ultimate Weapon, designed by Hactar, the computer built by the Silastic Armorfiends of Striterax.
How could you forget the Krikkit Wars [wikipedia.org]?
What? (Score:3, Funny)
No Happy Fun Ball?
Tom Clancy: "Shiva" virus (Score:4, Interesting)
In his novel, Rainbow Six, eco-terrorists design a virus which will wipe out all of humanity and plan to release it by spreading it at the Olympics. The athletes will take it back home to the host country, where it will multiply and kill everyone (except for the ecoterrorists, of course, who will live in a biosphere).
It's a nasty concept, made all the worse because it's not unachievable.
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
If you'll remember from "Rainbow Six", the bad guys solution to that was to drop their little "improved Ebola" off at the Olympics, then when people started dying from it all over the world, to announce that they'd been working on a vaccine for Ebola, and offer said vaccine to the world.
Alas, the "vaccine" was really just an Ebola virus culture intended to ensure that everyone got the disease....
Exterminate! (Score:4, Interesting)
Has everyone forgottten the Dalek Reality Bomb [wikia.com] which was designed to destroy the entire Universe?
Osterhagen Key (Score:3, Interesting)
From the end of the fourth season of the revived Doctor Who . . . The Osterhagen keys, when enough are presented at disparate sites, unlock the detonator to a set of nuclear devices implanted in the Earth's crust. Its purpose is to terminate the entire planet if the suffering of humankind is a fate worse than death.
Good news, everyone! (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Good news, everyone! (Score:4, Funny)
I suppose I could part with one of my doomsday devices and still be feared.
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Mile-High global Tidal Waves from "The Abyss"? (Score:4, Interesting)
(Mental Note: Do not piss off the deep sea dwelling aliens... Check!)
The best doomsday weapon is....GUILE, bitches. (Score:5, Insightful)
The best doomsday device, is not necessarily the one you have, but the one your enemy THINKS you have.
Be afraid (Score:4, Funny)
http://home.jps.net/~lsnyder/12_tick.html [jps.net]
Infinity Ball, The: The Infinity Ball is a fearsome device used by the Hey Empire. It resembles a sideways 8 ball and doesn't look menacing at all. It is powerful though. The ball has telekinetic powers, is extremely fast, and squeaks when it moves. It even has hyperspace technology built in. The Whats are extremely afraid of the Infinity Ball. They were chased across the universe by the little engine of destruction. When The Tick destroyed the Hey's attempts of bringing forth a universe ending cataclysm, he was attacked by the Infinity Ball. The ball crashed into the heroes chest, falling to the ground after impact. The most devastating weapon in the Hey's arsenal proved to be less devastating then it was once believed to be. In fact, it was pretty lame.
Slashdot (Score:4, Funny)
Period. Best doomsday device ... if you're a webmaster who's website contains a page that's featured on /.
Unicron? (Score:3, Interesting)
I like planet eaters!
Best fictional doomsday theories (Score:5, Insightful)
Peak Oil, Global Warming, New World Order, 9/11 Conspiracy Theories. :)
no enders saga? (Score:3, Interesting)
Doc Smith Lensman Weapons (Score:3, Informative)
Re: (Score:3, Informative)
Actually, the planetary negamatter bomb was first. They used it on Jalte's world, on the way to the Second Galaxy. Then the nutcracker - two normal planets with intrinsic velocities in opposite directions to crunch Jarnevon. Then the Sunbeam. Then the nutcracker with FTL planets to use on Ploor and it's sun.
That said, the best weapon Smith ever invented wasn't in the Lensman series. It was the one used by Doctors Seaton and Duquesne to destroy the Chl
Re: (Score:3, Interesting)
The ever more potent weapons of Doc Smith's Lensmen. First the Sunbeam, where the entire solar system is turned into a vacuum tube and the suns output is focused into a single beam. Then we have the Negasphere, a planetary sized chunk of anti-matter you toss at an enemy planet (with a tractor beam, because it's antimatter, see). The Nutcracker, two planets from another dimension, travelling in opposite directions, both exceeding the speed of light and then collided with the enemy planet in between. His ultimate weapon is so cool, I won't give it away, just in case you haven't read the books. You should read the books, if only to see who was playing with these ideas about 50 years before Lucas did Star Wars.
Look, if you're going to do a post about Lensman, you gotta do it right. You need more exclamation marks, you've got to gush constantly about how amazing it all is - and if you can work in a few words in all caps, all the better. Be sure to reiterate at every opportunity:
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
Re: (Score:3, Funny)
You don't need more coffee, you need less Haskell.
Re:WMD Dictionary (Score:5, Funny)
"We have solid everdense that Eye-rack, heh heh heh, uh, 'scuse me, Eye-rack possesses a, er, Helo, er, Halo, Hello, er, sumthinerother. Halo my baby, Halo my darling, halo my, er, gonna bomb their asses. Gonna bomb their asses back to the, um, bombed age. Cuz' that's what happens when you threaten 'muricans with Hellos of Mass Destruction."
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