Practical Jetpack Available "Soon" 237
Ifandbut was one of several readers to point out the arrival in Oshkosh of the first practical jetpack. It was invented by a New Zealander Glenn Martin, who has been working on the idea for 27 years. He plans to sell the gizmos for somewhere in the neighborhood of $100K. While previous attempts at jetpacks have flown for at most a couple of minutes, Mr. Martin's invention can stay aloft for half an hour. Both "practical" and "jetpack" may need quotation marks, however: The device is huge and it's incredibly noisy. And, "It is also not, to put it bluntly, a jet. 'If you're very pedantic,' Mr. Martin acknowledged, a gasoline-powered piston engine runs the large rotors. Jet Skis, he pointed out, are not jets, and the atmospheric jet stream is not created by engines. 'This thing flies on a jet of air,' he said. Or, more simply, it flies."
At first (Score:1, Funny)
It looked like someone linked to The Onion.
I'm not sure if it would be any more funny had it actually been linked from The Onion.
Finally, something for my Flying Car (Score:5, Funny)
Excellent, now my mechanic will be available to get to my flying car (which is also coming "soon") no matter where it is.
Re:Huh? (Score:5, Funny)
I for one... (Score:4, Funny)
... welcome our hearing-impaired jetpack flying overlords.
My news is far more important! (Score:5, Funny)
Okay, so it's not so much an android as a small two foot tall robot.
And by 'robot'.. I mean a cat wearing a cardboard box.
------------------ See! I can make my inventions sound grandiose by making things up, too!
I Read TFA ... And Lawled (Score:5, Funny)
In June 1997, seven weeks after the birth of his second child, Mr. Martin figured his prototype was now powerful enough to lift its first flier, so long as that person weighed less than 130 pounds. So he turned to his wife. "I said, 'Hey, Vanessa, what are you doing tonight?"
Mrs. Martin agreed to be her husband's levitating guinea pig.
She said she felt, in a way, that she had conquered it - "the taming of it, that's so exciting." It was, she said, "probably the best experience of my life."
Doesn't say a lot about being married to Mr. Martin or Mr. Martin's prowess in the sack, does it?
Pedantry (Score:4, Funny)
"It is also not, to put it bluntly, a jet. 'If you're very pedantic,"' Mr. Martin acknowledged, a gasoline-powered piston engine runs the large rotors. Jet Skis, he pointed out, are not jets, and the atmospheric jet stream is not created by engines.
Certainly one is permitted a bit of license in terminology. In fact, if you really get down to it, Jet Li is not actually a jet either.
Murderer (Score:5, Funny)
My neighbors can't even handle driving SUVs, but the roads are full of them (and the hell they've made of driving among them).
Turning these people into missiles with jetpacks is a great argument for prioritizing personal force field research.
Re:$100k? (Score:4, Funny)
Are you kidding?
First, I'd love to ahve one of these, assuming it worked as promised.
Second,... ah crap, I don't know, I just want one.
Re:Murderer (Score:4, Funny)
They will only be a problem for a little while. Mistake will weed them out very quickly.
In the mean time, stay indoors.
Gasoline?!? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I Read TFA ... And Lawled (Score:5, Funny)
Never know, she could have joined the 3-feet high club with Mr. Martin ....
I think you mean... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Huh? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Huh? (Score:5, Funny)
I'd feel sufficiently menaced by villains flying in on those things as to call them "practical" in the super-villainy market.
Of course they'd have to come in black... and a laser beam would be a nice option.
Re:Huh? (Score:1, Funny)
Wait... flying sharks with lasers?
*runs and hides*
Re:Huh? (Score:5, Funny)
IMHO it's "very practical", in the sense that how practical can strapping your ass to a 200-hp gas engine with two washing machine-sized rotors really be?
not a good idea (Score:1, Funny)
Say you have your catbrain powered big industrial mofo running smoothly, stamping out your expensive widgets. Cleaning crew comes in WITH vacuum cleaners WITH long cords being dragged around. Now guess what happens to your widget assembly line?
Re:Huh? (Score:2, Funny)
Never gonna mod you up, never gonna mod you down, never gonna spurn your posts or
Re:Pedantry (Score:4, Funny)
The New York Jets, Joan Jett, Jet The Band, and Jet's Pizza are also not jets. Jet Blue and The Jetsons are under review. Jet Clampett is a misspelling, and Jethro Tull doesn't understand the question.
Are we finished here?
Re:I Read TFA ... And Lawled (Score:3, Funny)
The following would have been better:
In June 1997, seven weeks after the birth of his second child, Mr. Martin figured his prototype was now powerful enough to lift its first flier, so long as that person weighed less than 13 pounds. So he turned to his wife. "I said, 'Hey, Vanessa, where's baby?"
The now ex Mrs. Martin said, "No. I don't think so."
Re:Huh? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:I Read TFA ... And Lawled (Score:5, Funny)
Never know, she could have joined the 3-feet high club with Mr. Martin ....
What you mean one jetpack each? I am not sure they are designed for...in flight refueling.
Sold Separately (Score:2, Funny)
Not shark (Score:3, Funny)
He's from NZ after all.
Anyway it doesn't look very practical at all - the two guys hardly ever let go of the thing.
Re:My news is far more important! (Score:4, Funny)
We kan haz pitchers, or DO NOT BELEEV!
Re:Huh? (Score:2, Funny)
* term may only apply to regions trapped between the years 1950 to 1980.