Star Trek Fragrances 169
An anonymous reader writes "I am a trek fan and excited about the new movie, but this is too much. From the Trek Movie Article:
'Genki Wear, known for its licensed science fiction jewelry and perfumes, has produced what might be the most unusual Star Trek product ever: Star Trek colognes and perfume based on the original 1960s television show. ... There are three fragrances planned for 2009 with the monikers 'Tiberius," "Red Shirt" and "Ponn Farr."'" Are they telling us we stink?
At Least It's Humorous (Score:5, Funny)
You smell that? That's ambergris [wikipedia.org] from the original humpback whales they used in Star Trek IV:The Voyage Home [wikipedia.org].
I will admit, though I hate the idea, at least the "Red Shirt" has some humor to it--the box has "Red Shirt: Because tomorrow may never come" on it. And the article subtitles the picture with "Live every day as if it could be your last, with 'Red Shirt' cologne." The hilarious marketing slogans basically write themselves though:
Eau de Janeway drives me crazy (Score:5, Funny)
You fanbois can keep your Jolene Blalock and Jeri Ryan.
Give me Kate Mulgrew any day. I'd pilot my shuttle into her delta quadrant any day.
Ponn Farr.. (Score:4, Funny)
Orion slave girls (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Eau de Janeway drives me crazy (Score:3, Funny)
I'd pilot my shuttle into her delta quadrant any day.
Until she opens her mouth. You'd think with 24th century medical technology they could cure smokers voice.....
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:5, Funny)
At the Bar:
Tiberius: Look at those women, my...god, I'll...need a...wingman. Red Shirt, accompany my away team.
Red Shirt: Aw Crap.
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:5, Funny)
Tiberius: Look at those women, my...god, I'll...need a...wingman. Red Shirt, accompany my away team.
What makes you think Denny Crane or James T. Kirk need a wingman to pick up chicks? ;)
Species? (Score:5, Funny)
I we sure these are designed to attract the female of the human species?
How about Kobayashi Maru (Score:1, Funny)
How about Kobayashi Maru
Its a blend of Deer Musk and Skunk.
I wonder (Score:3, Funny)
As Checkov Would Say (Score:4, Funny)
Perhaps you have heard Russian epic of Cinderella? If shoe fits, wear it!
Geeks are reknowned for their bathing abilities... (Score:5, Funny)
And their showering frequency.
Why every morning, the average Trek geek steps into his shower, hums the Trek theme loudly for 60 seconds, and calls that a sonic shower.
Water hardly ever comes into it.
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:3, Funny)
Why was that the first place my mind went? I can picture the ad campaign now, "Is your man a Star Trek nerd? Has he always wanted to boldly go where no man has gone before? To seek out new life, and fuck it? Well now he can experience all the extraterrestrial aromas with *dramatic pause*, Eau de la Vag Vert!"
Maybe I should seek professional help. Anyone got Deanna Troi's number?
Re:I wonder (Score:5, Funny)
Looking for an opportunity to use your nanoprobe?
They call it Ponn Farr (Score:3, Funny)
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:2, Funny)
If you're going to boldly go where no man has gone before, you wanna smell like it.
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:5, Funny)
Red Shirt (Score:5, Funny)
Marketing Exec - Let's see.. - burning flesh and polyester?
L - Quite right. And?
M - Cold sweat.
L - Anything else?
M - I'm thinking..a hint of self-defecation?
L - Excellent! We also included some sagebrush to give it that "stuck on a barren desert planet" air.
red shirt- (Score:5, Funny)
for when you really expect to get shot down
Vulcan One-Night Stand (Score:4, Funny)
Ponn-Farr and Away
Missing option: (Score:5, Funny)
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:2, Funny)
*squirts some "Red Shirt" cologne on himself*
Here, let my try some of that.
spray
Hmmm...smells pretty g
All have that unmistakable hint of .... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I wonder (Score:3, Funny)
even better name... Chanel No. 7 of 9
lol, this shit writes itself!
Re:I wonder (Score:3, Funny)
or simply "Borg" with fancy umlauts over the "o" to make it seem European.
Re:Missing option: (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Eau de Janeway drives me crazy (Score:1, Funny)
Well, if you meet a smoker perhaps you could ask them for the filters from their cigs.
Might help soak up the blood from your whining gash.
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:1, Funny)
Oh, sure. Leave out TJ Hooker.
He just hires his "dates".
Re:Species? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:At Least It's Humorous (Score:2, Funny)
That's what the transporter is for. Beam her up, Scotty. Leave the dress.