Darth Vader Robs Long Island Bank 190
Apparently the destruction of the second Death Star has stretched the Galactic Empire's coffers so thin that Lord Vader himself is robbing banks. From the article: "Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun — as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat — the fallen Jedi demanded cash."
handguns (Score:5, Funny)
These are not the money bags you're looking for. (Score:5, Funny)
Not a bad plan (Score:5, Funny)
But I think playing the Imperial March on a portable speaker while he walked in drew a bit too much attention.
There were actually 3 robbers. (Score:5, Funny)
Good thing nobody tried to shoot him (Score:1, Funny)
Obviously (Score:2, Funny)
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"No! Alderaan is peaceful! We have no weapons, you can't possibly... "
Darth Vader Robs Bank (Score:5, Funny)
He'll be pretty easy to spot (Score:5, Funny)
Unusual (Score:5, Funny)
Couldn't Cheney have just gone on a lecture tour like everyone else?
"I find the lack of cash in this paper bag... disturbing."
A day long remembered (Score:3, Funny)
Cool (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Obviously (Score:5, Funny)
I'm sure their executives do.
ATM (Score:5, Funny)
"Who's gonna give me a loan, jack-hole? You!? You got an ATM on that torso lite-brite!?" - Emperor Palpatine
Free Lightsaber with every new account (Score:5, Funny)
He's heading for that small Bank (Score:5, Funny)
That's no Bank;
It's a credit union.
Re:Han Solo (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Cool (Score:5, Funny)
Quiet, or you'll give Lucas an idea for another prequel: "Episode 3.5: How Vader Acquired Funding for the Death Star".
(Oh crap - I think he heard me.)
How I imagine the call to the tips line... (Score:4, Funny)
Operator: Hello Tip line
Caller: Yes I'm calling about the Darth Vader bank robbery
Operator: OK go ahead..
Caller: Yes the guy who did it lives in a galaxy far far away.
Operator: OK how does this help
Caller: Well it doesn't but I know he is on a large moon.. Wait that's no moon it's.. it's... massive......
Operator: Who is this?
Caller: It's Han {static}
Operator: I think we have a bad connection say again
Caller: It's Han {static} and I am near the deathstar located {static}
Operator: OK we have your location we are sending the authorities
Caller: OK can you hear me now?
Operator: Yes.
Caller: OK you will need to fly down the thermal exhaust port and fire a Photon Torpedo
Operator: um why?
Caller: Do you want to catch the guy or not {noise in the background} hold on. SHUT UP CHEWY
{Call cuts off}
Re:These are not the money bags you're looking for (Score:3, Funny)
Re:He'll be pretty easy to spot (Score:5, Funny)
No, it'll be the guy whose mom drops him off in an pimped out Escalade.
Re:There were actually 3 robbers. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:WTF? (Score:5, Funny)
How is robbing a bank amusing or entertainment? Just because the guy was in a costume that nerds might think is cool? Uhmm... I don't think so.
Is that you Ned Flanders?
Props to Robot Chicken (Score:2, Funny)
"What do you have an ATM in that chest LiteBrite of yours?"
They can steal it back... (Score:4, Funny)
... his pin number is 1 2 3 4 5.
Re:Cool (Score:2, Funny)
actually what prequels were you referring to? There is only the Star Wars Trilogy.
Re:Unusual (Score:5, Funny)
Re:These are not the money bags you're looking for (Score:4, Funny)
Re:He'll be pretty easy to spot (Score:5, Funny)
The police did pull over a suspicious pimped out Escalade, but according to the paperwork the driver wasn't the bank robber they were looking for.
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When he was... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:They can steal it back... (Score:5, Funny)
... his pin number is 1 2 3 4 5.
OMG that's the same combination as my luggage!
I can hear it now.... (Score:2, Funny)
Luke.... I am your robber.
I guess this is why he's not invited to reunions (Score:3, Funny)
Poor David Prouse, rock bottom indeed. Kinda cool he still fits in the suit.
Re:handguns (Score:4, Funny)
Yet more apropo, You got an ATM on that torso Lite-Brite? [imdb.com]
Hokey religions?? (Score:1, Funny)
Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid......
Hokey religions?? Check this out [wordpress.com]. (This apparently comes courtesy of the Icelandic Atheist Society).
Re:There were actually 3 robbers. (Score:2, Funny)
Just reread my post.
Was trying to retell a joke that Chris Rock originally did about it not being James Earl Jones in the Vader suit at the end of Ep. 6.
In hindsight, it sounded really racist. Sorry.
{funny aside, I'm black. Go figure.}
Re:They can steal it back... (Score:1, Funny)
... his pin number is 1 2 3 4 5.
It's an old code, but it checks out.
I've heard that ... (Score:2, Funny)
... the shoe polish he uses to keep his helmet shiny costs him an arm and a leg!
Or was that an arm and two legs?
Re:bat'leths (Score:2, Funny)
http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/02/04/1456240 [slashdot.org]