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Ajit Pai Taunts Net Neutrality Critics. Mark Hamill Taunts Ajit Pai (mashable.com) 346

An anonymous reader writes: Just days before voting to repeal net neutrality regulations, FCC chairman Ajit Pai introduced a comedy video at the annual gathering of the Federal Communications Bar Association -- and it offered its own self-disparaging version of Pai's tenure as a Verizon attorney in 2003. "We want to brainwash and groom a Verizon puppet to install as FCC chairman," says a real-world Verizon executive appearing in the videotaped skit. "That sounds awesome," Pai responds.

And the day of the vote Pai also appeared in another trying-to-be-funny video on the conservative site The Daily Caller demonstrating "seven things you can still do on the internet after net neutrality." In the first image he's holding a fidget spinner and dressed as Santa Claus, and the unmistakably patronizing video reminds critics that they can still upload photos of their meals to Instagram and "post photos of cute animals, like puppies." He also demonstrated that net neutrality critics can still stay part of their favorite fan communities -- by showing himself holding a light saber. And this unexpectedly drew the wrath of Star Wars actor Mark Hamill, who responded on Twitter by calling him "Ajit 'Aren't I Precious?' Pai."

Hamill also added that "you are profoundly unworthy 2 wield a lightsaber. A Jedi acts selflessly for the common man, NOT lie 2 enrich giant corporations." When U.S. Senator Ted Cruz responded -- likening government overreach to Darth Vader and urging Hamill to "reject the dark side" -- Hamill responded again, complaining that the Senator was "smarm-splaining." Hamill also added, "you'd have more credibility if you spelled my name correctly. I mean IT'S RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF YOU! Maybe you're just distracted from watching porn at the office again."

The Houston Chronicle reports that the newest meme on Twitter is now Pai's over-sized coffee mug stamped with the logo for Reese's Peanut Butter cups, "which he occasionally sipped from during the widely-criticized reversal." The Dangerous Minds site notes that some angry net neutrality supporters have even taken their complaints to Reese's Facebook page, adding "Perhaps these protester's pleas to the candy company are simply a misguided hope that someone, ANYONE will listen to their frustration."

"Clearly, the FCC wasn't listening to the estimated 83% of Americans who support net neutrality."
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Ajit Pai Taunts Net Neutrality Critics. Mark Hamill Taunts Ajit Pai

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  • Really? (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Frosty Piss ( 770223 ) * on Monday December 18, 2017 @12:37AM (#55758969)

    Let the Intertube Memes begin! This will not be pretty! Well, it will be pretty funny...

    I do, however, wonder if there might be legal ramifications in any lawsuits brought on the Net Neutrality issue? An impartial judge might look dimly on this buffoonery...

    • Re:Really? (Score:5, Insightful)

      by Joce640k ( 829181 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @03:35AM (#55759339) Homepage

      Was anybody actually surprised by the vote?

      It was crystal clear which way it was going to go as soon as Trump announced it. All the protesting and wailing was just background noise.

      • Re:Really? (Score:5, Insightful)

        by geekmux ( 1040042 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @06:27AM (#55759927)

        Was anybody actually surprised by the vote?

        It was crystal clear which way it was going to go as soon as Trump announced it. All the protesting and wailing was just background noise.

        If the leaders of a democracy are going to treat its citizens as mere background noise, then we no longer hold the status of a democracy, and should stop trying to proclaim we are.

        • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

          by Hal_Porter ( 817932 )

          The US isn't a democracy, it's a representative Republic.

          http://thefederalistpapers.org... [thefederalistpapers.org]

          It has been observed that a pure democracy if it were practicable would be the most perfect government. Experience has proved that no position is more false than this. The ancient democracies in which the people themselves deliberated never possessed one good feature of government. Their very character was tyranny; their figure deformity. â" Speech in New York, urging ratification of the U.S. Constitution (1788-06-21)

          I'm not even American, and even I know that.

          You vote for a President and the President appoints people like Pai. Now, admittedly you can make a case that appointing bureaucrats who can then make rules on the fly is something that people like Hamilton may well have had some issues with. However he definitely wasn't a fan of direct democracy, Classical Athens [wikipedia.org] style.

          • Re:Really? (Score:5, Informative)

            by Anonymous Coward on Monday December 18, 2017 @07:30AM (#55760079)

            If you want to be technically correct about all this ... the USA is a democratically-elected, federal & presidential, representative constitutional republic. Let's actually parse everything so we can be clear on all this:

            Democratically-elected: The reason why this is the case is explained further along. Except for the President which is done by the electoral college, the members of the Congress, as well as one's state and local governments (state Senate, Mayor, etc.) are done as a democracy.
            Federal: We have a federal government and the US for all intents and purposes is a Federation of States.
            Presidential: The head of the state, as opposed to a monarchy.
            Representative: This does hand-in-hand with Democratically-elected, we are a representative democracy and all Western democracies are practically such (due to sheer population sizes), we DEMOCRATICALLY (you know, like a Democracy) elected representatives to address concerns.
            Constitutional: Obviously, the a constitution of sorts that binds the government to the will of the people, govern by the rule of law.
            Republic: This means "of a public matter" for the country, not beholden to concerns of a select few elites.

            You want to split hairs on the term democracy. Get it right, most modern countries that have elections to leadership are known as representative DEMOCRACIES .

            I am American (since we're throwing one's nationalities around) and I know exactly the form of government here. It's much more than a nuanced "representative Republic" as outlined.

            • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

              by easyTree ( 1042254 )

              not beholden to concerns of a select few elites.

              Would you characterise the recent FCC behaviour as consistent with this?

          • Re: (Score:2, Flamebait)

            You are right it's an Idiocracy.
        • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

          by BlueStrat ( 756137 )

          If the leaders of a democracy are going to treat its citizens as mere background noise...

          The US is not a democracy, full stop.

          The US is a representative republic. And they *did* listen to the people, the people who elected their party and president to represent them with this internet deregulation as one of the campaign promises prior to the election. Elections have consequences, particularly for contentious executive-branch Agency/Dept./Bureau/etc administrative unilateral fiats. Same thing as with Executive Orders. What one administration can do, another can undo.

          Strat

          • Re:Really? (Score:5, Insightful)

            by Samurai Nigel ( 1017654 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @10:09AM (#55760985)

            This would be accurate if the gerrymandering that put these people into office weren't so disgustingly abundant. The representatives that are "elected by the people" are nowhere near an accurate representation of the will of the people.

          • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

            by Freischutz ( 4776131 )

            If the leaders of a democracy are going to treat its citizens as mere background noise...

            The US is not a democracy, full stop.

            The US is a representative republic. And they *did* listen to the people, the people who elected their party and president to represent them with this internet deregulation as one of the campaign promises prior to the election. Elections have consequences, particularly for contentious executive-branch Agency/Dept./Bureau/etc administrative unilateral fiats. Same thing as with Executive Orders. What one administration can do, another can undo.

            Strat

            Bollocks, republic and democracy are not mutually exclusive things. The USA is a democratic republic, or more specifically a federal republic with features of a representative democracy where where elected individuals represent the citizen body in government. If you require further proof read the writings of the founding fathers, the federalist papers and a whole mountain of other literature on the subject although most of us don't need to do more than note the fact that every two years you guys go out and

  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday December 18, 2017 @12:37AM (#55758971)

    He's a retard.

    • by Anonymous Coward on Monday December 18, 2017 @01:20AM (#55759075)
      Taking it easy on retards is what got us into this mess...
      • by Anonymous Coward on Monday December 18, 2017 @06:48AM (#55759975)

        No, voting for retards is what got you into this mess ;)

        • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

          by Anonymous Coward

          No, voting for retards is what got you into this mess ;)

          No. Having only retards for candidates is what got us into this mess.

    • I don't subscribe to giving retards leeway and letting their idiocy slide. It's basically what gets us deeper and deeper into shit. In the end, all it accomplishes if you don't call a spade a spade and an idiot an idiot is that the idiot thinks he's smart. You're basically reinforcing the Dunning-Kruger effect, and instead of an idiot noticing that he is one and trying to learn something, instead you encourage him to stay the idiot that he is.

    • That comment was very insulting towards retards. Their life is hard enough without insulting them by saying Ajit Pai is one.

      Besides he's very clearly an intelligent, educated man. So his actions are far better explained by him being evil. It takes a great deal of intelligence to construct such misleading bullshit. He knows hes lying, he knows every word out of his mouth is garbage, he is just acting to make himself rich by helping ISPs fuck consumers ever harder.
  • Uh... (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Richard_at_work ( 517087 ) <richardprice@g[ ]l.com ['mai' in gap]> on Monday December 18, 2017 @12:59AM (#55759021)

    Mark Hamill seems to forget that, in the Star Wars universe, the light sabre lost to the politicians scheming... Palpatines manoeuvres in the senate got him far further than wielding a light sabre ever did.

    • Mark Hamill seems to forget that, in the Star Wars universe, the light sabre lost to the politicians scheming... Palpatines manoeuvres in the senate got him far further than wielding a light sabre ever did.

      Pity then that he could not maneuver his way out of getting thrown down a reactor shaft.

      • Now THAT would be an event I'd gladly pay to see. Ajit? You available?

        • Now THAT would be an event I'd gladly pay to see. Ajit? You available?

          I'm not so sure, if Ajit fell down a reactor shaft there would probably just be a loud farting noise followed by the overwhelming stink of skunk perfume instead of the awesome flash of plasma they got out of Palpatine.

    • In the end, though, he was tossed into the reactor by his former pupil. Maybe Ajit one day notices just how he was used and tosses his masters down the drain, preferably shortly before he himself croaks, much like Vader did.

  • Clown show (Score:5, Insightful)

    by uvajed_ekil ( 914487 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @01:12AM (#55759059)
    If there was any remaining doubt, it has now been erased: Ajit Pai is not only incompetent, in the pocket of some of the biggest of all big businesses, against the will of the people, and morally corrupt, he's also a complete clown. (And I mean clown in the most disrespectful way possible, not in the fun loving, flower-squirting, balloon-bending sense.) I can't believe something as important as the FCC is in this moron's hands. You can debate the merits/follies of an outsider/village idiot like Trump all day, but Ajit Pai's nonsense is indefensible.
    • by Roger W Moore ( 538166 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @01:40AM (#55759115) Journal

      Ajit Pai is not only incompetent... he's also a complete clown.

      Exactly. So people are getting their Star Wars analogy wrong when they compare him to Darth Vader. This guy is Jar-jar Binks.

      • by prefec2 ( 875483 )

        Jar-Jar was a mess, but he worked for the good guys. While Ajit Pai works for the dark side or Jabba the Hutt. I am not so sure which. It also might be Spaceballs. They polluted their home planet, sniff perri air, and try to steal the atmosphere of another planet.

    • Re:Clown show (Score:5, Insightful)

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday December 18, 2017 @01:51AM (#55759139)

      I don't think I'd call Pai incompetent. Earnestly trying to do right by the American people, and failing, that is incompetence. Actively trying to screw us over, and succeeding, that's something else, but not incompetence. You can only consider him incompetent if you think this shitshow isn't intentional.

    • Dude, that's unfair, ok. Hardworking people should not be offended like this, it's anything but easy to be put into such a position with huge responsibility, where you can ruin a life in mere minutes if you're not good, causing a traumatic experience that may last a lifetime.

      You have any idea how long you have to study and learn if you really want to be good as a clown? And you compare this buffoon with people who dedicate their life to creating joy, wonder and entertainment.

      On behalf of all clowns on the p

    • by houghi ( 78078 )

      I would say tht he is EXTREMELY competent to be able to get this done against the will of everybody. Does not mean that I agree with what he does, be he does it well. He does what he was paid to do (by the companies).

  • Better approach: (Score:5, Informative)

    by Gravis Zero ( 934156 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @01:13AM (#55759061)

    Call your representatives and tell them what you want. Congress can pass a law to ensure net neutrality but they have to know it matters to voters. Also, if they won't support it then you need to get involved politically. If your preferred political party does not support net neutrality then you may want to reexamine why you are aligning yourself with them.

    • by x0ra ( 1249540 )
      you'd be better off petitioning your local government to open the local loop to competition. not everything has to be done at the federal level...
      • by geekmux ( 1040042 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @06:48AM (#55759973)

        you'd be better off petitioning your local government to open the local loop to competition. not everything has to be done at the federal level...

        100 million Americans have but one provider to choose from. Google is struggling to compete.

        Petitioning at the local government level is akin to pissing in a strong wind with your mouth wide open.

    • The only problem with this is that the republicans are rather firmly in the pocket of telecom companies (and the democrats as well to a lesser, yet still significant extent) so any national level net neutrality laws have not only a Trump veto to contend with, they also have a snowball's chance in hell passing the necessary votes required to even end up on Trump's desk. For it to stand any kind of chance the republicans need to get absolutely murdered in the next elections, which I doubt seeing how the democ
    • Don't forget to attach a bigger check than Comcast to that call.

      You don't expect a blowjob from a ho for free, do you? Then why do you expect a law from a ho in Congress?

    • Call your representatives and tell them what you want. Congress can pass a law to ensure net neutrality but they have to know it matters to voters. Also, if they won't support it then you need to get involved politically. If your preferred political party does not support net neutrality then you may want to reexamine why you are aligning yourself with them.

      Call your representative? Get a million angry voters together, head down to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and shout with one voice, "Give us a net neutrality law you corrupt skunk!", then head over to the senate building and repeat the exercise except the last word should be in the plural. Democracy works best when the politicians are scared stiff of the electorate.

  • ... won't someone please go all Darth Vader on his ass?

  • That 83%? (Score:3, Interesting)

    by fustakrakich ( 1673220 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @02:23AM (#55759215) Journal

    Until it translates into votes, it doesn't mean squat.

    *Sweep the House*

  • by prefec2 ( 875483 ) on Monday December 18, 2017 @04:19AM (#55759491)

    Trump - the Emperor
    Pence - the Emperor's left hand and a religious fundamentalist => no religious freedom
    Scott Pruitt - EPA dismantling agent => no healthy environment and no protection from dangerous and harmful substances in our food and water
    Ajit Pai - FCC dismantling agent => no net neutrality => no freedom in communication and information
    Steven T. Mnuchin - Give it to the rich => no state, no security

    This is not drain the swamp of corruption. This is more like drain all remaining habitats and screw the population so they sit all in a dessert.

    • Trump is Jabba the Hutt who was elected chancellor in an alternative Star Wars timeline.

  • But Pai's idiotic and abrasive antics from a position of power are starting to push my "Fuck you motherfucker!" button.

  • Kicks ass on twitter!
  • Right now he's letting donor money do the thinking for him.

    One day he'll call up Comcast for internet support. He'll play his "Don't you know who I am?" card and the operator will reply, in an Indian accent, "No, sir. We treat all of our customers equally."

ASCII a stupid question, you get an EBCDIC answer.

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