Earthlings: Ugly Bags of Mostly Water 332
darthcamaro writes "Earthlings Ugly Bags of Mostly Water is the name of a new documentary film - starring Worf (aka Michael Dorn)about Klingon language and culture. They've got a weird website too. 'Earthlings: Ugly Bags of Mostly Water' captures the lives, passions and quirks of the members of the Klingon Language Institute during their annual qep'a' (conference). The film's producers issued a press release about it today with some interesting quotes... 'The perspective of Michael Dorn, the world's most recognized Klingon, provides both serious and comedic elements to the project,' said Earthlings Director Alexandre Philippe. 'This is a man who embodies all the elements of a Klingon warrior: honor, respect, ferocity. For years, Klingon fans have looked to the Worf character for their education in Klingon culture.' Quaplah! /. !!"
HK-47? (Score:5, Funny)
Aside: Michael Dorn is not bad for a meatbag, though clearly a droid would make a superior host
Resigned: *sigh* If only my assassination protocol were still functional.
Appeasement: Maybe they will make a sequel.
Oh HK-47 [wizards.com], what WOULD we do without you?
Re:HK-47? (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:HK-47? (Score:2, Funny)
No (Score:5, Insightful)
I'm sorry but it's people like this that give science fiction a bad name.
However (Score:5, Funny)
Then again being able to speak Klingon pretty much does this without surgery.
Oh dear god (Score:4, Interesting)
Say it ain't so! [b3ta.com]
Re:Oh dear god (Score:4, Funny)
Re:However (Score:5, Funny)
And what RPGs nerdy Klingons play ? (Score:3, Funny)
Klingon word for NERD (Score:3, Funny)
Re:No (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:No (Score:5, Funny)
Re:No (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:No (Score:5, Insightful)
True, those people definitely exist, however most hardcore sci-fi fans aren't inspired visionaries....they're just plain old dorks.
Re:No (Score:4, Insightful)
I would wager that not very many members of the Mars Pathfinder team dress us as Klingons. A "true" science fiction fan is not defined as "someone who learns Klingon". I don't know why you seem to implicitly assume that the people being discussed are the pilgrims to the future.
Re:No (Score:2)
No Kill I
No Kill I: The Next Generation
No Kill I: Deep Space 9
I love being in a Star Trek band, and I love that 2 other bands used our name to name their bands with.
I'm not scared of daylight though. In October I start to ride a Ducati 250cc motorcycle round the world.
people like this (Score:4, Insightful)
"People like this" are society's excluded. And they (we?) will always exist because society will always exclude. And they'll find places to gather that are, well, exclusive.
Among the current crop of such places, Planet Klingon's not so bad.
Re:No (Score:3, Insightful)
Worse is when the people say "It wasn't a Klingon that called people ugly bags of mostly water!"
Re:No (Score:2)
I have to disagree, very few people take either written or visual media as seriously as "Trekkies" do. Such feverish obsession reminds me of when I was a child and used to watch Ghostbusters and Superman repeatedly. Eventually I grew up.
Don't get me wrong, I like sci-fi, I like Star Trek (TOS and TNG anyway) but some people just take it all to far.
Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:4, Funny)
You do realize he only pretended to be a klingon on TV/in the movies right???
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:5, Insightful)
Recognition of an actor as a famous or 'most recognized' "something" is not confusing the fact that they are actors. It's merely shortcutting the phrase "{character}, as portrayed by {actor}, is the most recognized {type of character}. When people think of {actor}, they think of {type of character}, and if you think of a {type of character}, you think of {character} as portrayed by {actor}."
If you think of "Vampire Slayer", you are likely thinking of one of five actors who portrayed them. Probably one of two characters (Van Helsing or Buffy).
It doesn't mean any of it is real... but "recognized" is a slippery term when dealing with fiction.
--
Evan "Didn't check any of the spelling of the names"
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:2)
You do realize that vampires aren't real right? (Sorry couldn't resist, don't get mad just teasing ya). Seriously tho, I will happily ghostwrite Mr. Dorn's book, "I am not Worf". After it sells a few million copies and everyone forgets about him, I will happily write the followup, "I am Worf After All, Please Give Me Your Money and Adoration".
Pretended to be an atypical one, at that (Score:2)
The Worf character was supposed to be a bit of a stiff, over-serious, stick-in-the-mud, not a guide to Klingon culture -- result of straddling two cultures when growing up. All the other Klingons are more raucous, lusty hellions.
That said, I'd say the geek factor with this is at least a 9.
Oh, and Jolene Blalock, get a good gander, 'cuz this is your new permanent home.
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:2)
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:3, Funny)
Sure it does. Except that Radio Shack can't order one without a part number.
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:4, Funny)
Yes, but you have to say it in Klingon.
Re:Ahead geek factor 6 (Score:4, Funny)
klingon version:
------------
tlhap [a] yIn
------------
Universal Translator Assistant 2.3
Joel Peter Anderson, June 16, 1999
Visit the UTA Project at
http://members.aol.com/jpklingon/uta
Makes you wonder... (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Makes you wonder... (Score:3, Funny)
Not really (Score:2)
It actually makes me wonder(even as someone who has enjoyed the occasional ST episode) what the hell this is doing on the front page.
That and how pathetic our current moderators are that you could get moderated "insightful".
Re:Makes you wonder... (Score:5, Funny)
Typically, more than 99% of water is water, the remaining 1% or less being minerals, salts, or pollutants (note - this is a made up statstic, no researchers were disturbed in the making up of this number). However, I have heard of no reports of water being comprised of Kilngons, so it is probably safe to say that 0% of water is made up of Klingons.
Perhaps you were more interested in knowing what percentage of the Klingon body is comprised of water. The answer to that question is, sadly, more difficult to obtain.
Answer: NaN (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Answer: NaN (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Answer: NaN (Score:3, Funny)
"You guys act like that ship was actually up there, orbiting the planet right now!"
(Roddenberry:)
"It IS!!"
== Paraphrased, possibly from one of Shatner's biographies
Re:Answer: NaN (Score:2, Flamebait)
Or maybe you should stop being the only person on the face of the planet whose brain can't handle using concrete syntaxes to discuss abstracts and hypotheticals.
Re:NOT REAL ? (Score:3, Funny)
But you can read their posts.
They're serious, aren't they? (Score:4, Funny)
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:2)
http://www.penny-arcade.com/view.php3
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:2)
Some times, I pretend that our sun is a star, and I venture out. Others, though, I don't feel my away team is big enough.
Re:They're serious, aren't they? (Score:3, Funny)
Starting to understand (Score:5, Insightful)
Now as such, why did they name it this, the title has nothing to do with Klingons at all.
Re:Starting to understand (Score:5, Informative)
I've just identified myself as a Star Trek Geek. Whoops!
Re:Starting to understand (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Starting to understand (Score:5, Funny)
Infact, I believe they are teaching this technique at the academy now. Its know as the mammory defense
Re:Starting to understand (Score:2)
I like Star Trek (looks up at Next Generation DVD box sets) but the nerdier side of it makes me shivver.
Re:Starting to understand (Score:2)
So.. were you intentionally illustrating the dorkiness of Star Trek jokes by pointing out that the "Ugly Bags of Mostly Water" line wasn't said by a Klingon? I mean, that's 28 seasons of Star Trek to search through.
Earthlings: Ugly Bags of Mostly Water (Score:5, Funny)
I'm a pretty bag...its just that i'm filled with "ugly water" because of modern industry.
-Grump
Scary (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Scary (Score:5, Funny)
Uhura: By the 23rd century, Star Trek fandom had evolved from a loose association of nerds with skin problems into a full blown religion.
Preacher: And Scotty beamed them to the Klingon ship, where there would be no tribble at all
Followers: All power to the engines!
Uhura: As country after country fell after its influenced, world leaders became threatened by the movement's power. So the trekkies were executed in the most befitting: virgins:
Trekkie: Bwaaaaaah!
Executor: He's dead Jim.
Trekkie: Bwaaaaaah!
Executor: He's dead Jim.
Re:Scary (Score:3, Funny)
I...cannot...say his name...forbidden...
Lord...AHH...Lord....XEMU!! AHHHHHH!
"He's dead, Jim."
Does anyone have the Klingon translation... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Does anyone have the Klingon translation... (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Does anyone have the Klingon translation... (Score:3, Insightful)
The "klingons" probably look down on roleplayers.. or those idiots who camp out at the new Star Wars premieres.. or those 50-year-old guys who dress as Sailor Moon (yeah, I read machall).. or -- heaven forbid -- linux weenies.
In fact, somebody out there thinks you are the lowest of the low, and ya know what? Fuck 'em.
Re:Does anyone have the Klingon translation... (Score:2)
Hilarious video is here [albinoblacksheep.com].
Re:Does anyone have the Klingon translation... (Score:4, Funny)
You guys totally lose. (Score:5, Informative)
I use that term (Score:5, Funny)
ST:TNG Episode (Score:2)
Re:ST:TNG Episode (Score:2)
wow.. that episode was a fucking ripoff of the original series where Spock attemps to mind-meld with the the inorganic (silicon-based) life form affectionately known as the "pizza-monster" ('cause it looked like a Round Table experiment gone horribly wrong).
Now that I've admitted I know all that, I'm forced to kill myself...
Re:I use that term (Score:3, Funny)
Ladies and gentlemen, today's "encouraging his management to outsource his job to India" example.
And the prize goes to .... (Score:3, Funny)
Quick, who will win the Slashdot Reality Contest (tm) this week!?!
Shakespeare (Score:5, Funny)
Like hell. If Hamlet were to be beheaded by Kahless, I might have paid more attention in English class.
Re:Shakespeare (Score:2, Informative)
Only Constructed Language from Popular Culture? (Score:5, Informative)
I thought Tolkien Elvish languages (Sindarin and the like) would count as well, considering Tolkien spent a considerable amount of time creating those languages. Although, I suppose, "popular culture" is a rather subjective term.
Re:Only Constructed Language from Popular Culture? (Score:2, Informative)
Oh yeah. (Score:4, Funny)
Nai Valaraukar tye-matar! (Score:2, Funny)
Google? (Score:5, Interesting)
http://www.google.com/intl/xx-klingon/
Why the title? (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Why the title? (Score:2)
Uh, why would it have been better to pick a Klingon spoken line? What relevance would it have to the meaning of the article?
Re:Why the title? (Score:3, Insightful)
I thought the choice was rather odd too. In the original context, a creature made of rock calls humans "ugly bags of mostly water", and it makes sense, because compared to a rock, we are. Coming from a Klingon, however, who are carbon-based humanoids like us and appear to have a similar level of water content in their tissue to humans, the phrase is very out of place.
Re:Why the title? (Score:2)
Hrmmm (Score:5, Funny)
Obligatory Futurama Quote (Score:4, Funny)
Losers (Score:2, Funny)
Regular /. readers should be embarrased that this was posted.
Mr Worf...Eat any good books lately? (Score:2)
Odd... (Score:4, Insightful)
http://forums.televisionwithoutpity.com/index.php
Re:Odd... (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Odd... (Score:3, Insightful)
Trailer (Score:5, Informative)
I wonder what is spoken more (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:I wonder what is spoken more (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:I wonder what is spoken more (Score:3, Insightful)
If you're such a nerd... (Score:2, Funny)
RE: Earthlings: Ugly Bags of Mostly Water (Score:3, Funny)
Utterly intolerable (Score:3, Funny)
Ugly bag of mostly water indeed.
Atleast I don't look like someone squated over my head and took a crap on my forehead.
And besides, if Klingons are so great, why doesn't speaking their language get you laid?!?!?
You try saying "ghu neH Ha' lItHa'?" to some chick and see what happens.
Re:Utterly intolerable (Score:3, Funny)
You try saying "ghu neH Ha' lItHa'?" to some chick and see what happens."
Well.... she'll certainly end up wet.
Re:Utterly intolerable (Score:5, Funny)
And besides, if Klingons are so great, why doesn't speaking their language get you laid?!?!? You try saying "ghu neH Ha' lItHa'?" to some chick and see what happens.
You've obviously never been to a con.
It's not that speaking Klingon can't get you laid but whether you want to get laid by the women that it will work on.
Worst. Movie. Ever. (Score:2, Funny)
Comic Book Guy: Worst. Movie. Ever. I will only see it three more times. Today.
Water? Meat! (Score:2)
And now: Klingon Hamlet: (Score:3, Funny)
King Claudius: This is all true.
Prince Hamlet: Impressive.
King Claudius: Hey, I can see my house from here!
A Fearsome Quote (Score:4, Funny)
This is correct and to be expected.
http://www.kli.org/tlh/sounds.html [kli.org]
I know what I thought when I first read this...
Nah... (Score:3, Informative)
Too easy.
Klingon Series (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:Say this once... (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:Klingon culture fascinates me (Score:2)
Re:Shouldn't that read ? (Score:2)