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It's funny.  Laugh. Entertainment Science

Caffeinated Beer Becomes a Reality 657

Cylar writes "CNN is reporting that Anheuser-Bush has developed a sweet, caffeinated beer they are dubbing B(E). Intended to compete with the trendy sweet concotions popular on the club scenes (such as Smirnoff Ice), it will contain caffeine, guarana, and ginseng." Not sure how I feel about ginseng in my brew, so I'll have to study this with a few cases.
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Caffeinated Beer Becomes a Reality

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  • New taste to acquire (Score:4, Interesting)

    by mirko ( 198274 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:18AM (#10438951) Journal
    Coffee is an acquired taste, so is beer, I guess one will have to learn to enjoy this beverage...
    • by Nos. ( 179609 ) <andrew@nOSPAm.thekerrs.ca> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:23AM (#10439032) Homepage
      At least you'll be awake and in a good mood while you "learn to enjoy" it
    • Gratuitous Linkage (Score:5, Informative)

      by swordboy ( 472941 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:29AM (#10439113) Journal
      Nudge, nudge. Link, link [anheuser-busch.com].

      This isn't for carb watchers as it has 22 grams in there. Probably all sugar. 6.6 percent alcohol will be chasing the Jager Bomb [google.com] crowd.
      • From your link, I heard that :
        1. It's Anheuser-Busch [anheuser-busch.com], not "Bush", unlike published by the editors.
        2. They are the one that make Budweizer and they suggest this very beer will have a "wow" taste... I wonder what they think of the "King of beers" taste... (I am an Horropean)
    • by Walt Dismal ( 534799 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:42AM (#10439280)
      Thank goodness. Finally a beer that goes well with Twinkies.
    • Beer might be an acquired taste. But please, do not brew a beer like this, id hate to see a new generation grow up thinking beer is like this. You can probably guess from my nick i appreciate a good, and often homebrewn, beer. It has taken me many years to taste my way through just a small portion of the beer spectrum, and its very enjoyable. But its not commercially viable to brew to so many tastes, so the big breweries just brew some variation of the Pilsner og light lager. Very booring, no wonder young p
      • by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:20AM (#10439791)
        Why the very thought of anyone drinking such a low class beverage has CAUSED MY MONOCLE TO POP RIGHT OUT! And really, who drinks beer in this day and age anyway? Everyone should drink only expensive wine and scotch.

        Why just the other day my chauffeur took a wrong turn off of the freeway and pulled me past this run down little liquor store where this shabby looking man (who by the way was driving a Pontiac! A PONTIAC!!!) who hadn't shaved for a couple of days was walking out with a bottle of Johnny Walker Red. RED LABEL?! I exclaimed, exhaling a puff of cigar smoke and tipping my top hat back in a bemused manner. WHO ARE THESE CRETINS? I practically had my driver phone the police right then and there...
      • by Malc ( 1751 )
        Hoegaarden? Come come. You can find better products than that from Belgium. Hoegaarden is pretty bland! I've been enjoying Chimay this summer. A nice change from my staple of which I get bored: Guinness. Hopefully I'll have a trip to the UK this Christmas and be able to seek out some of their fine real ales (served at a temperature that one can actually taste the beer too).
      • by csteinle ( 68146 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @11:09AM (#10440394) Homepage
        I always thought Hoegaarden sounded like an outdoor brothel.
  • MMmmmm Beer (Score:5, Funny)

    by mfh ( 56 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:19AM (#10438959) Homepage Journal
    In the immortal words of Homer Simpson...

    Oh, yeah. Beer busts, beer blasts, keggers, stein hoists, AA meetings, beer night. It's wonderful, Marge. I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.

    And now he can stay up late drinking beer without passing out -- because it's got caffeine!
  • Buzz Beer (Score:5, Funny)

    by Merlin42 ( 148225 ) * on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:19AM (#10438960)
    Does Drew Carey get royalty payments on this stuff?!?
    • Re:Buzz Beer (Score:5, Informative)

      by goneutt ( 694223 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:46AM (#10439335) Journal
      The Coffee in the beer products go way back. At the 1904 worlds fair (the same place that gave jack daniels the ribbons on the label) a beer was awarded a medal that used coffee instead of hops.

      I only know this cuz it was Kurt Vonnegut's grandfather (I think thats the right relation) and was mentioned in Time Quake.
  • by CrazyTalk ( 662055 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:19AM (#10438961)
    In reference to Buzz Beer (they had the concept years ago!) - "Stay up so you can get drunk all over again"
  • Whats next? (Score:2, Insightful)

    by stimey ( 819269 )
    Coffee with alcohol ? Oh wait..... burp
    • Re:Whats next? (Score:3, Interesting)

      by MoonFog ( 586818 )
      Well, here in Norway we've gotten milk with coffee taste (that's right, TASTE). It's horrible, and I really hope they stop mixing so many drinks. Alchohol in coffee is a rather good mix imo.
  • by account_deleted ( 4530225 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:19AM (#10438969)
    Comment removed based on user account deletion

    • "Sweeter flavors have definitely made an impact on 21- to 35-year-olds. ... It's a bigger part of the alcohol-drinking spectrum."

      I really don't have to say anything here, right?


      If they were proper yuppies, wouldn't they at least try the wines? And no, I don't mean Thunderbird.
      • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

        Comment removed based on user account deletion
      • 1. My college was yuppie school - and it was dominated by Natural Ice (Natty/Nasty Ice), Milwaukee's Best (the Beast), and other crappy cheap beers.

        2. I don't know a lot of girls that like beer. My wife can't stand the smell of most alcohol. She does kind of like these flavored beers/malted cocktails. On our honeymoon, I introduced her to iced tea a la Long Island.

        3. Most college kids don't really do the wine thing. Once you learn to like wine, it can become a very expensive taste. Personally, I limit mys
        • I don't know what kind of college you guys went to, but at mine we drank beer to get drunk.

          NO fancy stouts or heavy creamy Euro junk.

          Red Stripe, Blue Bull, Mickeys, Old English, whatever. Usually in the 40oz variety.

          What I did learn is HOW to drink though. If they are adding all this sugar and caffeine to beer, its time to buy stock in Tylenol...
    • by Otter ( 3800 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:36AM (#10439210) Journal
      A couple of years ago, I arrived in Islay (home of Bowmore and Laphroaig), checked into a Port Ellen hotel and went down to the local pub to try the local whiskies in their native environment. Everyone from farmers to surly teenagers was drinking -- Smirnoff Ice.
  • Ew. (Score:3, Funny)

    by njfuzzy ( 734116 ) <ian.ian-x@com> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:20AM (#10438972) Homepage
    So we take the nasty taste of American beer, and we load it up with sugar and stuff to make us jittery. Great plan.
    • Re:Ew. (Score:4, Funny)

      by EvilTwinSkippy ( 112490 ) <yoda@nOSpAM.etoyoc.com> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:32AM (#10439161) Homepage Journal
      It's like making love in a motorized canoe.
  • If Anheuser Busch makes it, it's crap. There when it was illegal to sell stuff like this in Germany and call it beer. It's a violation of the Reinheidtsgebot, or Purity Law, which states that beer can only contain malted grain, water, yeast and hops.
  • by Anti Frozt ( 655515 ) <{chris.buffett} {at} {gmail.com}> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:20AM (#10438978)
    Marge: I'd like a coffee
    Aussie Bartender: Beer it is
    Marge: No, coffee
    Bartender: Beer
    Marge: Cof-fee
    Bartender: Be-er
    Marge: C-O
    Bartender: B-E
  • by cerebralsugar ( 203167 ) * on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:20AM (#10438980)
    Now if they can just add nicotine to it too I can have all my vices in ONE CAN!
  • Yay!

    I'll stick to Irish Coffee.

  • by httpamphibio.us ( 579491 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:21AM (#10438993)
    at least you used to be able to count on somebody passing out...
  • by soccerisgod ( 585710 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:21AM (#10439000)

    As an inhabitant of a country that makes great beers, I have to say I find this highly appaling.

    You might wonder why I even care - after all, that beer is not exported to Europe and we can still drink our own (beerlike) beer. There's just one problem - the Football WC (you call it soccer...)

    Stupid FIFA has a contract with an American beer producer. Guess which. That means we can only buy American beer in the stadion.

    Someone from Europe who's pissed at piss...

    • by bludstone ( 103539 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:35AM (#10439190)
      American microbreweries are great.

      Not all american beers are the crappy bud chains. There are plenty of fantastic brews available stateside.
    • Stupid FIFA has a contract with an American beer producer. Guess which. That means we can only buy American beer in the stadium.

      Finally an explaination to all those football riots!

  • Guano? (Score:3, Funny)

    by drooling-dog ( 189103 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:21AM (#10439001)
    it will contain caffeine, guarana, and ginseng.

    At first glance I thought I saw "guano" in there...

  • That will go great with my 'tequilla and red bull.' Now I can really party all night. Don't expect it to taste good if it comes from Anheuser-Bush though.
  • by Exocet ( 3998 ) * on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:21AM (#10439004) Homepage Journal
    My first real thought, however, due to the distributor was, "gross."

    Immediately following that, though, I thought of a Simpsons episode, then a Futurama episode:

    Homer: Uh, yeah. I need something that will keep me awake, alert, and reckless all night long.
    Clerk: Well, Congress is racing back to Washington to outlaw these. [puts a bottle of pills on the counter]
    Homer: [takes bottle] Sold!
    [downs most of the pills on the spot]
    Clerk: Hey, you can't take that many pep pills at once.
    Homer: No problem, I'll balance it out with a bottle of sleeping pills. [takes another generous helping of pills]
    -- "Maximum Homerdrive"

    Fry: I'm never going to get used to the 31st century. [He points to his breakfast.] Caffinated bacon? Baconated grapefruit? Admiral Crunch?
    -- "The Series Has Landed"
  • Not a new thing... (Score:5, Informative)

    by Theaetetus ( 590071 ) <theaetetus DOT slashdot AT gmail DOT com> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:22AM (#10439010) Homepage Journal
    MoonShot Beer! [moonshotbeer.com]

    MoonShot contains the maximum amount of caffeine allowed by law: 45mg per twelve-ounce serving. Since this is a moderate level (a cup of coffee contains 70mg), we have formulated MoonShot to be light-bodied, smooth and therefore uncommonly drinkable.

    I've tried MoonShot... It's not bad, but not great. Little bit of caffeine tang, like Krank2O or Water Joe, but better masked by the beer. Tastes kinda like Rolling Rock. Weak, in other words.

    If you want caffeine with your alcohol, go for irish coffee [castletown.com]

    -T

  • The reason that Smirnoff Ice is popular is because it tastes like lemon-lime pop and it gets girls loaded.

    While another citrus malt-beverage wasn't going to turn any heads in this market a ginseng/caffeine alternative probably isn't either.

    Nothing like supporting the dangers of mixing an upper and a downer together. Yeah plenty of people drink Jagerbombs and coffee after drinking but it isn't marketed in the same drink.

    I'll stick to beer and I have a feeling that my fiance will stick to SI.
  • by 3.5 stripes ( 578410 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:23AM (#10439030)
    If it's made by Anheiser Busch, it's CRAP!
  • Or is it?

    B to the E power


    Hmmm
  • by Spencerian ( 465343 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:24AM (#10439044) Homepage Journal
    As if beer doesn't make you pee enough!

    B/E! Now you can piss like the mighty Mississipp!!
  • Does anyone know how this would actually make you feel? I mean, think about it:

    alcohol is a depressant
    caffeine is a stimulant

    Therefore, it would seem that combining the two would make you feel like complete and utter crap. Does anyone have any experience?
    • Therefore, it would seem that combining the two would make you feel like complete and utter crap. Does anyone have any experience?

      Ever heard of Irish Coffee? It is the wonderdrink - the alcohol lubricates you, and the caffeine (much more than this) wakes you up. Plus, the whipped cream tickles your nose.

  • by JUSTONEMORELATTE ( 584508 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:25AM (#10439060) Homepage
    Years ago, a friend of mine was brewing and thought he'd invent a recipie for Coffee Porter. Rather than read what anyone else had done, he decided to just wing it and hope for the best.
    He came into work one Monday, and asked what I knew about coffee. Seems he had a bottle with dinner the night before, but hadn't been to sleep yet.

    Now any homebrewer can tell you that the typical formula for 5-6 gallons of beer calls for about one pot of strong coffee for a subtle but noticable flavor.
    Mark, on the other hand, took a pound of french roast, ground it to the "Espresso" setting, and dumped it into secondary for two weeks. If I remember the back-of-the-envelope calculations, we figured each bottle had 500 - 700 mg of caffiene, compared to 40-70 mg in a cup of coffee.

    He gave me a bottle, and we used it for shots at a party, but that's about all I could do with it.

    --
    Free gmail invites [slashdot.org]
    • Re:Coffee Porter (Score:3, Interesting)

      by Chelloveck ( 14643 )

      When I was brewing (haven't dusted off the ol' brewpot in years) my signature beer was Double Jeopardy Espresso Stout. All the alcohol, twice the caffeine!

      Start with an Oatmeal Stout recipe. Substitute a good dark roast coffee (medium grind) 1:1 for the oatmeal. Brew as normal. When adding the hops near then end of the boil, toss in a handful of No-Doz (or cheap generic substitute). I used about twenty 200mg tablets per 5-gallon batch. Ferment, bottle/keg, and drink. Cheers!

    • The problem with putting coffee in home brew is that the oil kills the head. Now if you don't mind a beer that looks flat then use coffee it tastes great.
  • by EvilTwinSkippy ( 112490 ) <yoda@nOSpAM.etoyoc.com> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:25AM (#10439065) Homepage Journal
    They must get a nickel every time someone runs to the John. Don't we suffer enough!
  • Now what to do with all the zombied Caffeine-Alcoholists that:

    Never sleep

    Are always happy

    Work superfast, but super-inaccurate

    I think an ACNEA-organization is necessary here (Alcohol-Caffeine Anonymous)...

  • More mass market crap. I've been brewing a caffeinated stout (using real, fresh roasted and ground coffee) for ages!
  • So since alcohol is a depressant and caffeine is a stimulant, what is the net effect of this beverage???
    • by ooby ( 729259 )
      Alcohol and caffiene do not affect the body in "equal but opposite" ways. Alcohol generally blocks or slows the signals transmitted between neurons in the the brain. Caffiene increases your heart rate and causes you to release adrenaline. The net effect is an increased jitteryness with a decrease in motor skills. Imagine a hyper drunk. Also, both chemicals are notorious for causing dehydration.
  • Thats a drug using no-no.
  • Bad combo (Score:5, Funny)

    by FunWithHeadlines ( 644929 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:27AM (#10439087) Homepage
    Too drunk to drive, too jittery to just sit in the back seat.
  • by BelugaParty ( 684507 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:28AM (#10439105)
    This competes with Red Bull and Vodka and its derivitives.
  • by SWroclawski ( 95770 ) <serge@@@wroclawski...org> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:31AM (#10439143) Homepage
    Is the first I've seen of the "Energy Drink Beer" series. It smells like orange soda and tastes like a Sweet Tart.

    6% alcohol cancels out the stimulants though,
  • Think about it...

    Caffeine + Alcohol + Lots of Liquid --> You'll be running to the toilets every five minutes.
  • Having just moved to the USA from Canada, I can tell you that many of those "sweet"-type alcoholic drinks are already malt based... not vodka, gin, etc based...

    Amazing what artificial flavors can accomplish.
    Although, yes, it's nice to see a big player pushing new product...

    Personally, I'll stick with my scotch.

  • Am I the only one who read this and though of the Pan Galatic Gargle Blaster, which is like being whacked round the head with a gold brick wrapped in a slice of Lemon? or am I just weird?
  • You can drink it, it's over the counter!
  • B(E)? (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Speare ( 84249 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:40AM (#10439259) Homepage Journal

    B(E)? The geek in me reads that as "B of E" and then turns that phonetically into BFE, a vulgar initialism for "bum f* egypt," meaning the middle of nowhere.

    How do companies decide to call things by stupid unpronounceable names? Pentax *istD [google.com] Olympus m:robe [google.com]

    Then you have the stupid names which are just too close to derogatory names. I'm not talking about creative stretches of normal words like "Back Orifice" or "Internet Exploder." I'm talking about nonsense turned into the nearest possible normal words. Olympus eVolt [google.com] sounds revolting.

  • by jav1231 ( 539129 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @09:43AM (#10439287)
    Isn't mixing stimulants and depressants (ginseng and alcohol) a bad thing? There are incidences of people mixing vodka and Red Bull and actually dying. I'm sure this is due to drinking an inordinate amount, but still uppers and downers together doesn't sound like good eats.
    • There are incidences of people mixing vodka and Red Bull and actually dying.

      There in fact are incidences of ppl mixing Vodka and just about anything and dying - alcohol in sufficient quantities will kill you and in lesser quantities can put you at risk of accidental death.

      Are you next going to suggest that rum & coke should be banned because it is a potentially fatal combination? It seems to have been pretty popular over the years. What about black Russians? Irish coffee?

      Please come down from your
      • Please come down from your prohibitionist mentality and let adults make their own decisions about what they put in their own bodies - provided they don't plan on operating heavy equipment or firearms while under the influence.

        Can we add computers to that list? Maybe then there wouldn't be so many security holes in applications and stupid Slashdot posts.

    • Woo-hoo! Our favorite combo, here on the farm, used to be methamphetamines and alcohol (and motorcycles and guns, but that's off the subject).

      The alcohol takes the unpleasant harsh edge off the speed, and you get the euphoric effect of the alcohol without the sloppy-drunk problems. Plus you don't pass out!

      Mixing drugs like this is done all the time by the pros: go into any mental ward, and ask what people are taking. You'll find most of them on a "cocktail" of drugs. Some are for the primary complain
  • what about Sparks? (Score:3, Informative)

    by stevetures ( 656643 ) <stevetures@nosPAM.gmail.com> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:19AM (#10439769) Homepage Journal
    Well then what about Sparks malt liquor? As a musician, I can testify to the Sparks, where drinking it gets you to loosen up but you don't stoner out and write drone-ish song. http://www.drinksparks.com/ [drinksparks.com] Ya gotta love how the can is painted to look like an orange battery, with the positive and negative terminals.
  • by The Unabageler ( 669502 ) <josh@3i o . c om> on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:19AM (#10439770) Homepage
    I call it The Olympian - it keeps you running full speed all night (and most of the next day) like an olympic athlete.

    ouzo
    coke
    coffee
    redbull

    An acquired taste, but sure to get you drunk, black you out, and keep you going!
  • by Willard B. Trophy ( 620813 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:31AM (#10439924) Homepage Journal
    Mill St Coffee Porter [millstreetbrewery.com] is brewed around here. It's great. It even comes in proper stubbies [stubby.ca]...
  • by Kakurenbo Shogun ( 64436 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:45AM (#10440118) Homepage
    Next thing you know, they'll be putting ginko biloba into beer so that you can get drunk, do something stupid, and remember it in the morning.
  • Shot in the Dark? (Score:3, Interesting)

    by chihowa ( 366380 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @10:56AM (#10440242)
    OK, even though I should be heading off to class now...

    I still recommend my concoction to any beer loving coffee affectionado. Two shots of good espresso in a pint of stout. After a night of those, you get that perfect wide awake drunk going. If, of course, you can't handle a whole night of these, just one or two is enough to keep you strong until the sun comes up.

    I thought the name was fitting because the night I decided to try it I was having a hard time deciding whether to make a cup of coffee or have a beer. It still sounds kind of stupid, though. Oh well.

  • Great... (Score:3, Funny)

    by jpellino ( 202698 ) on Tuesday October 05, 2004 @11:08AM (#10440384)
    Now we have our choice of
    Angry drunks
    Sad drunks
    Happy drunks
    PLUS!
    Hyper drunks
    Chatty drunks
    Oscillating drunks.

    Woohoo.

    And which genius at AB decided what beer needs is MORE diuretic effect.

Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

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