Sophos Releases Klingon Language Version 94
Bantu1 writes to mention an attention grab by anti-virus company Sophos, which is now offering a Klingon language version of their popular anti-virus software. Now Qo'nos too can be completely safe from the storm. If only we could see a Sophos logo in the next Paramount endeavor, the cycle would be complete.
May I be the first to say... (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:May I be the first to say... (Score:5, Interesting)
I'm about to commit a cardinal sin of slashdot, but I don't care.
Bring back idle
At least when all this worthless, not even funny 'news' was on idle, I could filter it out of my front page. Now it's in every category: news, entertainment, IT... Just put it in the corner somewhere so that those of us that don't want it don't have to see it.
Re:May I be the first to say... (Score:5, Insightful)
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Oh, and it didn't go anywhere [slashdot.org]. It's still sitting behind the scenes, watching, waiting, getting ready to threaten our intelligence and very existence!
As for this story however, it is actually "News for Nerds". Even if it doesn't matter.
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This is akin to the religious freaks that speak in tongues.
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Klingon software is *NOT* released... (Score:3, Interesting)
... it *escapes* [taragana.com] leaving a bloody trail...
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wtf?
Advertisement. And it worked!
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"$Header: index.html,v 1.2 2009/05/08 14:53:14 james Web page status: Draft 0.8. Req action: Mktg to review wording and imagery (better screenshots required etc..), and QA to check links. Expected launch date: July 2009. Software status: Ready. $"
Except oddly, it looks like this is a leak.
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wtf?
Score:3, Wordsmith.
L.
Re:May I be the first to say... May *I* say: (Score:2, Insightful)
KAM CHE CHAMI CHEK!
Picard: KAM CHE CHAMI CHEK!
Gowron (smiling): You swear WELL in Klingon, Picard....
Tribbles!!! (Score:4, Informative)
"Use Sophos's Klingon Anti-Virus to quickly perform an on-demand scan and find viruses, spyware, adware, zero-day threats, Betazoid sub-ether porn diallers and Tribbles that your existing protection might have missed. The software can be run without deactivating your current anti-virus software. Phasers can be left set to stun."
Haha!
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"Use Sophos's Klingon Anti-Virus to quickly perform an on-demand scan and find... Tribbles that your existing protection might have missed.
I breed my own Glommers to keep my home Tribble-free.
Klingon Linux distro (Score:4, Interesting)
I would've thought the first major software with Klingon support would've been a Linux distro.
Or is there already such a thing...?
Re:Klingon Linux distro (Score:4, Informative)
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Alas, Klingon did not make it into the Unicode script - it was proposed (and there's a copy of the proposal to give it Unicode codepoints for it), but in the end, it didn't get approved...
I'm not sure what's at those codepoints that were proposed, but maybe if enough people just start using them, we can unofficially make it part of a extended Unicode standard?
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No, that's the wrong approach. Creating a conflict with Unicode Consortium decisions will just be inconvenient for people and make the Consortium mad. The right approach is to encode Klingon in the Private Use Area. This has already been done. The encoding is registered at the Conscript Registry [evertype.com]. The Klingon range is F8D0-F8FF [evertype.com]. James K
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Well yes, of course
Ubuntu 8.10, you can get it here:
http://klingbuntu.wizage.net/
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Well yes, of course
Ubuntu 8.10, you can get it here:
http://klingbuntu.wizage.net/ [wizage.net]
[facepalm]
Re:Klingon Linux distro (Score:5, Funny)
This isn't really in Klingon, though, is it? It just 'brings together some of the best in Klingon art, music and applications'...
That's all well and good, but without the language, etc, would any true Klingon actually use it?
THIS is why Linux isn't ready for the Klingon Desktop...
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Why would the Klingons use such a geeky OS as Linux? I'm pretty sure they're using the more warrior like operating environment, IBM System 3.
Why they need anti-virus for M$, I have no idea. Maybe it's integrated in their transporter?
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I would've thought the first major software with Klingon support would've been a Linux distro.
"The kill button takes up most of the screen!"
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Been there done that, if you look at the Languages menu in Mac OS X, you will find " tlhIngan Hol"
Also, there is a package [ubuntu.com] for Ubuntu.
Ahem. (Score:5, Funny)
Where can I find this dishonored warrior?
Re:Ahem. (Score:4, Funny)
Hmmm.... (Score:1)
Klingon's use Windows (Score:2)
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Re:Klingon's use Windows (Score:4, Funny)
A real warrior carves bits onto his harddrive with the tip of his Bat`leth.
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I doubt they WINE much about it either.
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"Today is a good day to crash!"
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A real warrior does not use Operating Systems that coddle you like OSX.
A real warrior does not hide behind the security of a Linux install.
A real warrior relishes the eternal battle between himself, his operating system and those that would cunningly infect your system.
Windows is obviously the only choice for honorable combat.
Heard in the HQ (Score:5, Interesting)
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When a virus is successfully detected and eliminated the alert is a hearty "Q'apla!".
as long as.. (Score:2)
as long as there are no rights of ascension or duels to the death involved (though I'd love to see a bat'leth fight....more over...just love to say the word "bat'leth").
u know...maybe that's why there are lots of viruses out in the world....if there were Klingons who would slay you if you were to write a virus and it f's up their computers...well...that should be the best deterrent if any.
just imagine the thought of a bat'leth gutting them would discourage a lot of virus writers (at least the scriptkiddies
I almost feel sorry for them.... (Score:1)
I almost feel sorry for them....
With all the 'your using our IP' cry baby-ness going on, I'm sure lawyers will be sending them take down requests in droves.
There is at least one story every day on ./ about some corporation whining and threatening about things like this. :(
Maybe that is why they didn't fully finish the page.... ;P :Quote:
Why did we translate it into Klingon?
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Duis consequat odio vel risus fermentum at hendrerit sapien malesuada.
Why? (Score:4, Insightful)
From the webpage:
Why did we translate it into Klingon?
<Need some blurb here> Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Duis consequat odio vel risus fermentum at hendrerit sapien malesuada. </end blurb>
I'm guessing that's Klingon for 'God fucking knows'.
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Fortunately, there is a musical answer to that question: here [youtube.com]
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I guess (Score:2)
They figured it'd be a better use of their time than, you know, actually writing a virus scanning engine that doesn't suck and take half your CPU.
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That's not Klingon. It looks like Latin. Plugged it into a online translator, but only got a partial translation.
Trecares
Re:Why? (Score:4, Informative)
It looks similar to Latin, but actually it's just frequently used nonsense placeholder text [wikipedia.org].
Why am I so ashamed? (Score:5, Funny)
Betazoid sub-ether porn diallers
Why am I so ashamed - to admit that this sounds pretty hot?
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New from the Alpha Quadrant:
Betazoids Gone Wild!!!!
Just what goes on at those Betazoid Weddings?
We bring the cameras and you get to see!
Its like you're actually participating in the joining ceremony and seeing just WHAT all the fuss is about!
If you like the holo-recording do nothing, and another installment will appear on your PAD next month, cancel at any time.
Betazoids Gone WILD!!!
Act now and reserve for your free copy of: "When Founders Attack!" Newly recorded in the Gamma Quadrant!
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Betazoid sub-ether porn diallers
Why am I so ashamed - to admit that this sounds pretty hot?
should i be ashamed or proud that the first thing it brought to my mind was "that's a continuity error--sub-ether is hitchhiker's guide technobabble!"?
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Paramount? (Score:2)
Can't Paramount sue them for the money they will make off of the four copies they sell (plus damages)?
Oh crap! (Score:3, Funny)
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What -- a Non-Screen Of Death?
ERROR (Score:2, Funny)
ERROR: maximum geekativity threshold reached. Product STOPPED.
Nothing wrong with this (Score:1)
Google search has an interface in:
Elmer Fudd (Google seawch for those wascaly wabbits)
Hacker (aka 13375p34k)
Klingon
Bork Bork Bork (I don't even know what that is)
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Bork Bork Bork (I don't even know what that is)
Sweedish Chef [wikipedia.org], from the Muppet Show.
Great business move (Score:5, Funny)
Bantu1 writes to mention an attention grab by anti-virus company Sophos who is now offering a Klingon language version of their popular anti-virus software.
First time I've seen an anti-virus company release a birth control product!
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Babies: the worst infection out there.
klingon? (Score:1)
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I presume that you have handed in your slashdot account resignation?
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No, you're thinking of Var'aq [esolangs.org].
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Browse some more at esolangs.org, and just imagine the pointless creativity has some sane, rational basis even though it doesn't.
Product Placement (Score:3, Interesting)
If only we could see a Sophos logo in the next Paramount endeavor, the cycle would be complete.
After having Kirk with a nokia mobile phone [memory-alpha.org], and drinking Budweiser [memory-alpha.org], I fully expect Uhura will be running emails from the Klingons through her Sophos package in the next film.
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Wait a minute (Score:2)
Mozilla wants to kill tabbed browsing, The Hard Drive Is Inside The Computer, and now Sophos in Klingon? Is 19 May a significant day I wasn't previously aware of? Second Fools Day or something?
Make it so (Score:2)
When is Rosetta Stone going to include Klingon?
I'd actually give it a shot if they did.
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Probably about the same time they include Elvish and Esperanto as well.
Expected launch date: July 2009 (Score:1)
A few more fun things on the site (Score:2, Informative)
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I am clinically fascinated by the product video they made for this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6XD2zGtvAM [youtube.com]
It features a backing track of "YMCA" translated into Klingons (thank goodness there are subtitles so I can join in)
Who needs to buy drugs after watching that?
Example Of Use (Score:2)
Sophos:"We have detected a viral anomaly in disk sector 1A10BC"
Me:"Captain, We have detected a viral anomaly in disk sector 1A10BC?"
Sophos (grudgingly):"Captain, We have detected a viral anomaly in disk sector 1A10BC"
Me:"What are you waiting for? Go kill them!"
Sophos (indignantly):"I don't kill viruses, I jail them"
Me:"Huh. Some goddamn Klingon you are!"