CIA: 10 Tips When Investigating a Flying Saucer (cia.gov) 54
coondoggie writes: You may not associate the Central Intelligence Agency with historical UFO investigations, but the agency did have a big role in such investigations many years ago. This week the agency posted an article called 'How to investigate a flying saucer." The release is part of a series of old documents dredged up as a nod to the return of The X-Files to TV this weekend.
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!Let's talk about the fucking X-files reboot instead!"
Yes!
For instance, why is a public institution expending its resources making the marketing campaign for a private company?
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Nope, not the same crew. Twas the geeks at the NSA that did the Star Trek thing, the assassins at the CIA actually wander out into the real world and do things.
Re:Nice to know tax dollars are at work flogging T (Score:5, Funny)
Twas the geeks at the NSA that did the Star Trek thing
Correct . . . the CIA command center is an exact copy of Deep Space Nine's Quark's Bar.
Complete with a holodeck.
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the assassins at the CIA actually wander out into the real world and do things.
Actually, the CIA learned a long time ago that character assassinations work a lot better than the kind with bullets. Just ask the former head of the IMF, who dared to challenge [cnn.com] the U.S. Dollar as a standard world currency.
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A Distraction (Score:3, Insightful)
The release is part of a series of old documents dredged up as a nod to the return of The X-Files to TV this weekend
Horse manure.
It's yet another opaque way of distracting the public from the real sh*t they are up to.
Like:
NO CARRIER
Re:A Distraction (Score:4, Funny)
TRUST NO CARRIER
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The release is part of a series of old documents dredged up as a nod to the return of The X-Files to TV this weekend
Horse manure.
It's yet another opaque way of distracting the public from the real sh*t they are up to.
Like:
NO CARRIER
More like: NO CAREER
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trust them (Score:1)
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Donald Trump says there is. And he is going to send them back where they belong!!!
Send them back?!?
F that!
He's going to build a wall!
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Really, no aliens visiting us now? I knew tourism had gone down, but... Does that mean the MiB are out of a job?
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How's this for tip number one. Logically if they have the technology to make it here, they will also likely have the technology to hide being here (as evidenced by slow but sure advances in our own stealth technology), so logically if they are seen it is only because they want to be seen. The only logical reason for them being here, of course the great show we are putting on, now that's some real reality TV, assuming advances in technology, 3D sensorama, feel what the short hair crested rock throwing monke
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Any species with the level of technology needed to cross the vast distances of interstellar space would probably have very little reason to hide from us. We would probably be about as much a threat to them as ants.
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They hide to keep the show going and not corrupt it. Flip side of the argument, we get one chance in the total history of the galaxy to make it, to reach out to the stars, to become our own advanced society and to interfere would be steal that chance, to deny us our own identity and to express our own culture. Just because we routinely do that shitty stuff to each other does not mean that a far more mature stable race would do it to us, supplant their culture upon us by force. You can readily imagine how s
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Personally, I find it works better the other way round.
Other dinnerware needs equal publicity (Score:5, Funny)
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It's those flying black blenders that make me nervous.
The most dispappointing thing (Score:2)
the rules they set out are pretty much the top ten rules for investigating any kind of phenomena.
No really specific advice like "if you see unusual pods lying around the area keep your distance".
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Or "Do not shoot the robot."
So... (Score:2)
That guy with the weird hairdo works for the CIA?
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I'm not saying that guy with the weird hairdo works the CIA...
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No, The Donald's from the saucers. They forgot to trade him for J. Bieber. (Take 'em both, please)
Tip #11 (Score:5, Funny)
If there's tentacles, contact Japan.
Tip #1 (Score:5, Funny)
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Left out some things (Score:3)
2) Make sure you look all interviewees in all eyes - no matter how many.
3) Wear a locked chastity belt to protect your nether regions.
4) Make sure you translate the ENTIRE book title.
Re: Left out some things (Score:2)
"HOW TO COOK FORTY HUMANS"
Misunderstand what they were investigating (Score:5, Insightful)
They weren't looking for little green men. They were looking for:
1) Intelligence related to secret Soviet and Chinese aircraft testing (CIA)
2) Information on just how much the public actually knew about U.S. secret aircraft testing (the military and FBI).
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They were also interested in UFO enthusiast groups, because they were believed to be vulnerable to infiltration by foreign governments. True story.
ObXKCD (Score:5, Interesting)
https://xkcd.com/1235/ [xkcd.com]
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Only insightful (or interesting) if you assume that absence of proof constitutes proof of absence.
Of course it doesn't...and neither does faith constitute proof of presence. But a little evidence would help there.
"Disclosure" project call bullshit (Score:2, Informative)
So after "5. Eliminate False Positives", and "7. Examine Witness Documentation" how many **true positives** _still_ remain?
Because the Disclose project calls bullshit:
* https://www.youtube.com/watch?... [youtube.com]
--
~2022 Proof that we're not alone
Another X-Files resurrection? (Score:2)
Its come back from the dead more often than one of its zombies. The series should be left in the past, by the end it had jumped more alien sharks than was good for it and had become a parody of itself.
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I thought it's always been self-parodying. That was one of its fun points. You never knew what's real, what's imagined, and what's a gag.
It had a fun way of mixing world-changing forces with mundane office politics and every-day situations: big, small, serious, and humorous all at the same time. It was a Rorschach show: you saw whatever you wanted to see.
It was more fun to watch if you stopped trying to figure it out. The reaction of people to odd events is the key, in my opinion, and not the odd events the
Official US Airforce Aircraft Identification Chart (Score:5, Funny)
I cannot believe that no one has posted this yet:
Official US Airforce Aircraft Identification Chart [myconfinedspace.com]
Just three steps (Score:2)
- Look inside flying saucer, you should find a flying cup and a flying spoon
- (optional) put flying sugar in flying cup, stir with flying spoon
- Drink flying coffee
Trust us, we're from the government (Score:5, Informative)
There is only one step:
Visit "witnesses" and tell them "You didn't see anything strange in the sky, did you?" in a menacing manner. Thus there are no "sightings" to worry about.
In truth, they brought in J.Allen Hynek as a Project Bluebook skeptic. And he was deeply involved in debunking sightings and reports. But by the time he left Bluebook, he had begun to see patterns of evidence he could not dismiss or ignore, and became convinced he had been wrong and something actually was happening. The man walked in a scientist with a closed mind and by the time he left, he'd changed his mind completely. That doesn't happen without a good reason. Hynek remained a UFO believer for the rest of his life.